The all-new, never-sleeping, repo-powered
Sales Guy Sam The sales guy who never gets up.
He lives in your chat. He runs a huge repo of routines. He remembers everything, learns every week, ships PRs, and runs on whichever brain you plug in.
* There is no number. He is already in your Discord. Batteries, coffee and feelings not included.
Feature one
He lives where you live
Discord, Slack, Teams. Sam does not need a dashboard. He posts one line when something needs a human, and nothing at all when nothing does.
No app. No account. No tabs.
Feature two
A huge repo of routines
routines in the box. Every one a markdown file with a schedule, a rulebook and an autonomy level. Edit the file, change the guy.
But wait, there's more!
Feature three
Memory foam. Literally.
Sam stores knowledge in the repo: claims ledgers, registers, journals, battlecards, voice guides, memory files. Press on him and he keeps the shape.
Go on, press it.
Firmness: fresh out of the box
Feature four
He learns
Every week Sam runs a retro on himself. A wrong mapping, a missing rule, a bet that lost: he writes the fix into the routine file and opens a PR. Slide to see him settle in.
Feature five
Works with GitHub
Every run is a commit. Every proposal is a PR. Every lesson is a diff you can read, revert, or argue with. No black box, just a repo.
git blame works on him too.
Feature six
Runs on any brain you like
The routines are plain markdown. The runner is whatever model you point at them. Swap the brain, keep the guy.
Real people. Real chat channels.
Customers are sleeping better
“I woke up and the leads had been chased. I did not chase them. He did.”
“He opened a PR against his own routine because the routine was wrong. I merged it. I feel things.”
“Posts one line, then goes quiet. Would recommend. Four stars because he never comes for drinks.”
Pre-sale. Operators are standing by.
Reserve your Sam
Leave your email and Sam posts one line in your channel when he is ready to move in. No newsletter. No sequence. One line.
First come, first chased.
Get on the list
Reserved
Sam will post one line when he is ready. Until then, nothing. That is the feature.
Sleep tight.
Tonight only (and every night)
Try him for 100 nights
- Free delivery. It is a repo.
- 100-night trial. He runs the nights anyway.
- 0% APR. Sam has no interest. In anything but replies.
- Ships flat. Unfolds in Discord, Slack or Teams.
Offer ends in
1-800-HE-IS-ALREADY-HERE
Or skip the hold music and use the form above.